Premonition about my own death
I had a premonition about my own death. In the dream, I was in a hospital, hooked up to a ventilator — and then my teenage son unplugged it so he could charge his phone. Should’ve used a condom
Honesty when dating
Jane became single and joined a singles group on Facebook. Because Tinder is full of dishonest and phoney people. After six months, she was really pissed off. She had a date with one guy who said he was a teetotaler, but was drunk when they met. Another guy said he would never date more than … Read more
Chapter Seventeen: The Treasonous Devil
(This is from my upcoming book “How I Became a Dirty Old Man (like Bukowski)”) Finally, my daughter came back and picked up that demon mutt. Sparky wagged his tail and leapt into her arms like an angel, as if he hadn’t spent three days turning my flat into a war crime scene. She kissed … Read more
Erectile dysfunction
My good friend John found a woman, Jane, on Tinder. After a couple of dates, they met at John’s apartment. After a nice dinner and a couple of glasses of wine, they went to the bedroom, took their clothes off, and it so happened that John couldn’t get an erection. This happens to almost all … Read more
Relationship advice, part 454
Since people were asking for relationship advice, here’s another little gem. Before you get into a relationship, invite your future mother-in-law over to your place to watch a movie. Nothing reveals a person’s true character quite like watching a film together. And no matter how hard you try to avoid it, once you’re in a … Read more
Man Hunting, Part 2
Recently, I gave women advice on how to impress a man on a first date. Now for the follow-up: how to make sure he doesn’t disappear into thin air once he’s gotten laid—aka, the guide to a perfect first time. Once you’ve got the man back at your place and decided it’s time to get … Read more
Making an impression on a man on the first date
For women who want to make a lasting impression on a man on a date. Don’t overthink it. Men are simple creatures, and most of them get excited about the same things. These will work on almost any man (and if they don’t, you can forget him immediately; he’s not the real deal). You’re guaranteed … Read more
Sex is so much better when there are feelings involved.
Already when I was young, I learned that nothing makes sex better than when your partner looks you straight in the eyes and says, “I love you.” The incredible feeling that comes from that is truly beyond words. It lifts sex to entirely new dimensions and makes it so much better. For decades I’ve thought … Read more
Brain Research
For a long time, scientists have had a consensus that the brain develops until about the age of 25. Now this belief has been proven wrong. Recent MRI studies have revealed an intriguing phenomenon: in some people, the brain can continue to develop for years, even decades later. What is peculiar here is that this … Read more
Why You Should Never Leave the Bedroom Hungry
Once, with my girlfriend (about 20 years ago), we were about to have sex. We were already naked in bed, kissing, the foreplay was done, and we were ready to go — when I remembered that the condoms were in the bathroom. I went to get them, and then thought I’d grab a drink from … Read more