posts not safe for work or social media, may contain sexual references
My expectations weren’t high. They never are, these days. But still, I had that tiny flicker of hope, the same pathetic flame that keeps moths frying themselves on lightbulbs. I shaved, splashed on some aftershave that expired sometime during the Obama administration, and combed my hair in a way I imagined said: distinguished gentleman rather … Lue lisää
Se menee näin: kun hän haluaa syömään johonkin hienoon ravintolaan, niin minä vien hänet ja maksan. Kun hän haluaa uusia vaatteita, lähdetään yhdessä shoppailemaan, ja minä maksan. Kun hän haluaa lomamatkalle Italiaan, niin lähdetään yhdessä, ja minä maksan. Ihan kuin oltaisiin naimisissa – paitsi että minä saan seksiä!
Every man, at some point in his life, feels a sense of inadequacy about his sexuality. It’s happened to me twice. The first time was when I was chatting with my wife’s friend Jane, and she mentioned that her husband can make love for at least an hour. I felt a bit down after that, … Lue lisää
This happened over 20 years ago. I was at the Heureka Science Centre with my kids. There was a microscope set up where you could look at bull sperm. Next to it was a sign that said, “Live sperm available from the guide.” I turned to the gentleman standing nearby and asked, “Could we get … Lue lisää
I received a letter by email saying that a criminal had managed to hack into my computer. He claimed to have seen from my browser history that I had visited porn sites and had even recorded me via my computer’s camera while I was touching myself. He then threatened that if I didn’t pay, he … Lue lisää
I was reading my diary, reminiscing about old dates. There is one I’ll never forget: I’m really pissed off. Tinder. Do I need to say more? I’ll tell you anyway. I found a woman on Tinder. Pretty, nice, everything good. We decided to go on a date. Drinks at a local restaurant. I went a … Lue lisää
