I came home after shopping. At the staircase, I noticed a distinct smell of shit. My neighbor was clearly drunk and waiting for the elevator. In an elevator, the smell got really bad. I couldn’t help myself; I looked at him disapprovingly and said, “I guess someone has pooped his pants.” He looked confused and answered, “I guess so.”

When I got into my apartment, I could still smell that shit. Then I noticed there was dog shit on the bottom of my shoe.

I can’t wait for the next time I see him.

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