{"id":161,"date":"2025-09-04T08:44:17","date_gmt":"2025-09-04T08:44:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/?p=161"},"modified":"2025-10-15T15:06:48","modified_gmt":"2025-10-15T12:06:48","slug":"kid-free-chronicles-episode-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/kid-free-chronicles-episode-one\/","title":{"rendered":"Kid-Free Chronicles: Episode One"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

At last, the long-awaited first kid-free break of the year has arrived. It\u2019s only been a few hours, and I\u2019ve already ticked off my carefully curated bucket list of guilty pleasures:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ripped open a bag of candy as loudly as possible, then abandoned it on the living room table.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Went to the bathroom with the door wide open.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Paraded around the apartment without pants, because why not?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Watched porn in the living room and got a little\u2026 self-reflective.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Belted out the entire Moomin theme song at full volume while brewing coffee.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And now? Well, now I\u2019ve got several kid-free days ahead and absolutely no idea what to do next. Suggestions are welcome\u2014preferably ones that don\u2019t involve pants.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

Get NordVPN 75% off + 3 extra months, and stay anonymous & safe. If you click here<\/a> and buy, I may get some beer money, at no extra cost to you.<\/em><\/strong><\/mark><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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At last, the long-awaited first kid-free break of the year has arrived. It\u2019s only been a few hours, and I\u2019ve already ticked off my carefully curated bucket list of guilty pleasures: Ripped open a bag of candy as loudly as possible, then abandoned it on the living room table. Went to the bathroom with the … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"pagelayer_contact_templates":[],"_pagelayer_content":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,16,12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-161","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-single-life","category-life","category-teens"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=161"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1482,"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/161\/revisions\/1482"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=161"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=161"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dirtyoldman.blog\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=161"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}